A-Rod Mystery Solved!

Yesterday, on our way back from Rick (last name deleted) and Corie's wedding in beautiful Ithaca, NY, we decided to stop for dinner at a Red Robin in Northampton, PA. None of us in the car had been to one in a while, but we all remembered how tasty their burgers are, so the decision on where to stop was easy. So when we arrived, we got out of the car and walked up to the restaurant only to see this on the front door:



Alex Rodriguez, 3rd baseman for the New York Yankees, is the Kitchen Manager at a Red Robin? And in Pennsylvania of all places? No wonder why he can't hit in the clutch! Millions of Yankees fans all over the country have been searching far and wide for the answer as to why A-Rod is one of the worst clutch performers you will ever see, and now we finally know: It's because whenever he comes up to the plate in an important situation, he's worrying about whether or not his staff at the Red Robin is crafting fare that lives up to the lofty standards of Red Robins everywhere, and not the game situation he's currently in!

You thought you could hide your other life from us Alex!? Well guess what? YOU WERE WRONG. I AM ON TO YOU. You better quit now before everyone finds out about this and you come under more scrutiny than you already are. It's game over for you, my friend.