1) Arlo Glass - I've somewhat come around to him ever since he became leery of BITCH and then made a joke about staring at her boobies, but sometimes he asks too many questions when he should just do what he's told, especially when he's taking orders from a certain new CTU executive...
2) BITCH - Currently rotting in a cell, waiting for Cole to have some free time so he can tear her limb from limb for not only betraying her country, but breaking his heart.
3) Brian Hastings - As I've been discussing, the spirit of Bill Buchanan has been growing stronger and stronger with him, which directly lead to my friends and I liking him more and more. Well, apparently Secretary of Homeland Security Tim Woods doesn't feel the same way, because he replaced Hastings as head of CTU with...
4) Chloe O'Brian - Yes! An inspired pick by Tim Woods, and the person that Bill Buchanan himself would have chosen to be his successor. The country instantly became 459% safer as soon as Hastings finished going over protocols with her, and she already proved her mettle by instantly realizing that someone at the scene had secretly poisoned Samir so that he would die and couldn't talk. Bill's watching you from above, Chloe, and damn is he proud of you. RIP Bill. CTU is in good hands now with Chloe, but it'll never be in as great a hands as it was when you were here with us.
5) Cole Ortiz - Jack correctly called him a good agent as he said his goodbyes, and he is right. Cole's a good man, but he's also another person who needs to just do what Chloe says. Don't question her request for a toxicity test on Samir, Cole, just do it. She's always going to be right.
6) Renee Walker - I'm speechless. I cannot believe that Renee has been taken from us, and more importantly, taken from Jack. She will truly be missed, not only by Jack and her fellow friends in anti-terrorism, but by me, because Renee and I had forged a special bond over the last few months, a bond that not even death can break. At least she had the honor and privilege of coitus with Jack right before she was killed. If you're gonna go, might as well go out having just previously engaged in the pinnacle of humanity, right? Renee is a much more deserving recipient of the silent countdown than Hassan was. A moment of silence please.
7) Jack Bauer - You have to wonder about the audacity of God to take away every woman in Jack's life from him when Jack is a greater being than He. First Terry, then Audrey Raines, now Renee. You just have to feel bad for the guy. And once he finds out that the Russians were behind the murder of Renee sometime next week... oooooooooooo boy, Russia better watch out. We are about to see Jack kill more people and blow up more countries in the next 6 episodes than he has in all 8 seasons combined. Buckle up!
8) Omar Hassan - Hopefully not still sitting in that chair with his throat cut open. One would think that someone bothered to at least put him in a body bag or something, right? His exotic and estranged wife is now the President of the IRK, which most likely means she's going to die too.
9) Allison Taylor - Can see right through the Russians and knows that they never intended to sign the peace treaty in the first place. You think she had a shit fit when she found out Rob Weiss was co-leader of the plan to turn Hassan over to the terrorists? Watch out for her when she finds out the Russians were also behind the plot to nuke Manhattan. Baldy Ruski better get ready for a right bitch slappin'!
10) Rob Weiss - Currently in prison, awaiting trial for treason and most likely looking forward to the death penalty. Unless by now Jafar has gotten into the prison dressed as a vagabond and convinced Rob that he needs to go with him to the desert to recover the ancient lamp for him, in which case he has escaped and we'll never see him again.
Other random thoughts from an episode where my soul was sniped from me:
- Kyla Hassan needs to fall out of a window on the 36th floor of the UN or something. She sucks.
- In typical 24 fashion, there is always someone behind the main plot that is bigger and shadowyer (I just invented that word. Boom.) than those who were originally carrying it out. Last year it was Coach Yost. This year it's the Russians. Jack is going to exterminate all of them.
- Something's fishy about Eat Logan's return. Obviously he wants to appear well-intentioned, but that look in his eyes tells you he has other motives. I'm as excited as anyone that he's back, because I missed that hesitant scowl of his, but let's not forget that he was behind the assassination of David Palmer, the greatest President this country has ever scene. Let's hope he takes a step in the right direction towards redemption for the good of this country, and for his own good, because Jack will kill him too if he screws the pooch.
Excuse me while I cry myself to sleep. Goodnight forever Renee. I love you.
The worst thing I ever saw in this episode was Homeland Security Director Tim Woods firing Brian Hastings as director of CTU New York and replacing him with that whining bitch, Chloe O'Brian. As you can see from my comments, I do not like Chloe. I never have. I have always found her whining and personality disorders a pain in my ass. This latest plot development was the most utterly stupid thing I have ever seen on television. She was a computer tech. Chloe has at least one or two hours of experience in the field. And yet, that idiot Woods had decided she would be a better person to run CTU New York than Hastings? Why? Because the CTU director had failed to sniff out Dana Whatshername as a mole. I realize that many fans have been complaining about this, as well.
ReplyDeleteWell, let me bring up another name. Nina Myers. For several years, Nina was Jack's second-in-command at CTU Los Angeles. They even had an affair. Jack eventually learned that she was a mole out of sheer . . . dumb . . . luck. Nina was ordered to tell a lie about Kim in order to lure Jack into the clutches of Victor Drazen. No one has ever bothered to complain about Jack's inability to sniff out Nina as a mole, until it was almost too late. Jack never knew that a vengeful Tony was playing a double game against him in Season 7 until it was almost too late. Yet, Brian Hastings is the one who has to suffer for failing to sniff out a mole. This is hypocrisy at its worst. And all of this happened six or seven episodes before the end of the series.
You realize I'm one of your 7 readers, right?
ReplyDeletePresident Logan is the greatest leader.
ReplyDeletescott, that is the most audacious and appalling comment i have ever bestowed my eyes on.
ReplyDeletePresident David Palmer inspired a generation. And I don't mean in 24 land, I mean in real life.
Bill Buchanan and President Palmer will forever be remembered as the greatest American heroes of all time.
I am nervous to see how sad you will be when the show is actually over forever. All I remember about Renee was that she cut someone's fingers off
ReplyDelete