So the other day I was watching the Braves on MLB Network (which, by the way, is a phenomenal channel. If you're a baseball fan, it should be a nightly stop for you), and I, like the rest of the country, quickly came down with a case of Jason Heyward fever. That guy is a flat-out stud. He's 6 foot 4, 220 pounds, and leads the Braves in home runs and RBIs - and he's only 20 years old. So naturally while watching him, I thought,
I should probably buy a custom player t-shirt with his name on it from mlb.com. So to mlb.com I went so I could make the purchase. After looking at my shopping cart as I prepared to checkout, I had my next thought:
I'm not spending enough money here. Yes I know, that's a thought that often gets people into trouble, but I succumbed to the urge anyway and continued to browse the website. And after a couple minutes of doing so, I stumbled across something that immediately took me back to the glory days of yore: baseball cards.
Nothing reminds me more of my childhood than baseball cards. While other kids my age were smoking drugs or banging in the janitor's closet (what the hell kind of elementary school did I go to?? I might be exaggerating a bit), I was collecting and trading baseball cards. As a kid, I'd say that 95% of the total allowance I garnered from my parents during the time they gave it to me went towards the purchase of baseball cards. No football cards. No basketball cards. No hockey cards. Baseball only. Steven's going to the convenience store to get milk? He's coming back with a new pack of cards. Steven has a funeral to go to? He's sneaking out to go to the corner and buy a new pack of cards. You name the event, I was somehow coming out of it with new baseball cards.
I remember the late 80s - early 90s, when every pack of Topps would come with that cardboard-like stick of gum; the stick would leave that powdery residue all over the card that it was up against inside the pack. The Bazooka packs always had the best gum, but Bazooka cards weren't worth all that much, so I tended to stay away from them. As the years went by, more and more companies started making cards. Topps and Upper Deck were the mainstays, but there was also Fleer, Donruss, Score, Stadium Club, Leaf, Pinnacle... the options were endless. Those who were lucky had the 1989 Upper Deck Ken Griffey, Jr. rookie card. I have 2 of them. Young baseball fans today can identify a bit more with the 1993 Topps Derek Jeter rookie card. I have 4 of them, 2 of which are Topps Gold. You always wanted to be the guy who had the most valuable cards, but not because you wanted to sell them and make money, but because of their sentimental value and the bragging rights over your friends that they gave you.
I remember going over to my friend Doug's house with my baseball card binders in tow, ready to make trades. His favorite player was Frank Thomas of the White Sox, but I never wanted to trade him any of mine because Frank Thomas and Ken Griffey, Jr. were always the most valuable cards in a set. They were always worth $3.00, the rest of the set was $2.25 and under. I remember bundling all of my common cards together in rubber-banded piles, because they weren't worth squat and I didn't care that the rubber bands dented the sides. I remember going to card shows, running directly to the David Justice sections of people's collections, and buying every single one that I didn't already own. My friend Koz and I grew up with Justice being our favorite player, so we collected as many cards of his as we could. Justice has his own binder in my collection, and the last time I remember counting them I had over 450 cards of him alone. I remember making trades with my younger brother where I would convince him that 2 cards of crappy Astros players were worth just as much as the Topps All-Star card that featured Tony Gwynn and Cal Ripken, Jr., because obviously 2 crappy cards are worth as much as 1 card with 2 Hall of Famers on it (right Matthew? HA HA!).
I stopped collecting cards somewhere between 1999 and the turn of the century. There were just too many companies, too many cards to keep up with. Companies started coming out with cards that had jersey pieces on them, cards that were coated in layers of holograms and such. It was like they were bastardizing those wonderful pieces of card stock with pictures and stats of players that I loved. Plus I was in high school and other "interests" were taking me over, so the baseball card era of my life unceremoniously came to an end. Now tens of thousands of cards occupy numerous binders and shoeboxes on the top couple of shelves in the closet of my old bedroom at my parent's house. Every once in a while when I'm back at home I look at them and think about taking them down, looking at them, organizing them in a different way than how they already are. But I never do. And over the years since I've stopped collecting, and more specifically in the last couple of years, I've read many articles about the downfall of the baseball card industry. Too many brands and not enough collectors lead to most of the companies folding. Card values are down. It's sad, because I feel that kids these days don't get to enjoy the national pastime in the way I was able to as a kid because of the dearth of baseball cards. Now Topps has an exclusive deal with Major League Baseball to be the one and only card company that can have Major League players and teams on them. One company. One choice. The writing is on the wall for this once-booming and now dying industry.
Which brings me back to the box of cards I purchased along with my Jason Heyward shirt, the box of cards that was delivered to me at my office today. I remember each new pack of cards being like Christmas morning: you had no idea what was beneath the shiny wrapping and couldn't wait to tear that wrapping off to find out. How about we re-discover this feeling, if only for one lonely night in my mid-twenties?! I clearly have no friends. The highlights of my night of reminiscence:
- The box starts with some thing called a "Commemorative Patch Card," and mine is of.... Chase Utley, with a commemorative patch from the 2008 World Series. Great. Doesn't Topps know I hate the Phillies? If you're going to bastardize the baseball card with a patch, at least make it of a player I actually like!
- Oooo! A 3 player card of NL RBI Leaders with Prince Fielder, Ryan Howard, and Albert Pujols! I bet if my brother owned this card I could give him 3 crappy Astros cards for this one.
- An old Frank Robinson card as a part of the series "The Cards Your Mom Threw Out." Nice. They're putting old cards in the packs for you to re-discover. Except they're not the actual old cards, just new ones that look like the old ones. Oye.
- Tim Lincecum! Awesome.
- "History of the Game" series of cards, that teach you different things about baseball, such as when it was invented, when the first World Series was... not too bad. I can dig that.
- Tommy Hanson! Nice. Give it to me Topps.
- Albert Pujols! He HAS to be the Frank Thomas or Ken Griffey, Jr. of this generation of baseball cards. $3.00 BOO YAH.
- Oh sweet. So this card has a code for you to enter online so you can get an actual old card that "Your Mom Threw Away." Looks like some people have gotten old Mickey Mantle's, Cal Ripken's, etc. Let's see what I get.... a 2007 Joey Gathright? You've got to be kidding me. I'll leave that one in the trash, Mom. Thanks.
- Ah, a Tobi Stoner Rookie Card. I have no idea who that is, except he has a cool name and he plays for the Mets, which means he's going to suck.
- A toppstown.com card, which gives you a code to go online and unlock a virtual pack of cards. I don't want virtual cards. I want real cards that you can hold in your hands. This just keeps getting worse.
- Topps Attax Head-to-Head Card Game?! What is this, Magic the Gathering? No wonder why this industry is going down the toilet.
Well as you can see from my discoveries this evening, there are reasons that the baseball card industry is suffering, and it's obvious that Topps will go to great lengths and great absurdities to attract new customers. So while this wasn't as satisfying an experience as it was when I was a kid, it was still fun to remember that old feeling I used to get when I opened a new pack of cards. Unfortunately though, that's not a feeling that kids these days can get anymore, and that is surely a travesty.
I thank you for bearing with me during this self-indulgent bit of nostalgia. And yes, I realize I am a huge nerd. Also, feel free to comment with any baseball card collecting memories you may have as well. I'd love to hear them.
Hola chicos y chicas, and welcome back to the Brain Fart! As you know, it was on hiatus for the last week because I was on a cruise ship somewhere in the Bahamas sipping on whiskey and gingers, smoking cuban cigars, and floating on the laziest of lazy rivers at Atlantis in Nassau. Clearly I did not have time to write anything or even think about you people, but now I'm back to the real world, so you can go back to looking forward to Mondays again.
I remember the late 80s - early 90s, when every pack of Topps would come with that cardboard-like stick of gum; the stick would leave that powdery residue all over the card that it was up against inside the pack. The Bazooka packs always had the best gum, but Bazooka cards weren't worth all that much, so I tended to stay away from them. As the years went by, more and more companies started making cards. Topps and Upper Deck were the mainstays, but there was also Fleer, Donruss, Score, Stadium Club, Leaf, Pinnacle... the options were endless. Those who were lucky had the 1989 Upper Deck Ken Griffey, Jr. rookie card. I have 2 of them. Young baseball fans today can identify a bit more with the 1993 Topps Derek Jeter rookie card. I have 4 of them, 2 of which are Topps Gold. You always wanted to be the guy who had the most valuable cards, but not because you wanted to sell them and make money, but because of their sentimental value and the bragging rights over your friends that they gave you.
I remember going over to my friend Doug's house with my baseball card binders in tow, ready to make trades. His favorite player was Frank Thomas of the White Sox, but I never wanted to trade him any of mine because Frank Thomas and Ken Griffey, Jr. were always the most valuable cards in a set. They were always worth $3.00, the rest of the set was $2.25 and under. I remember bundling all of my common cards together in rubber-banded piles, because they weren't worth squat and I didn't care that the rubber bands dented the sides. I remember going to card shows, running directly to the David Justice sections of people's collections, and buying every single one that I didn't already own. My friend Koz and I grew up with Justice being our favorite player, so we collected as many cards of his as we could. Justice has his own binder in my collection, and the last time I remember counting them I had over 450 cards of him alone. I remember making trades with my younger brother where I would convince him that 2 cards of crappy Astros players were worth just as much as the Topps All-Star card that featured Tony Gwynn and Cal Ripken, Jr., because obviously 2 crappy cards are worth as much as 1 card with 2 Hall of Famers on it (right Matthew? HA HA!).
